:)

:)

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

UNLEASH

On my way to my rainbow
That is but in my mind,
I raced as always and met a spider
“You are mad” I said
Your web is nothing but a mirage
For you rule here alone
Unheard of, in a kingdom unknown
Too proud of your imaginary throne

Nay... friend, you are a like fellow too, said he
I live in my kingdom and you in your perception
That being but a faint shadow of reality
You erect huge walls and let not the ideas in
Stagnant frame rots and you dance in the sweet scent
Shunned ideas lay like dead and your merry your win
Are you not living in your own world?
My kingdom still is better for it is real and stout
And yours, made up of imporous walls
That keeps all new change far and out


In shame hung my head
How exact was each word he said!
I pondered and the spider was true
I am a criminal, the victim being my soul
As I broke the walls , like a bird it flew!





74 comments:

  1. Deserves a place in English textbooks.. Seriously

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  2. hiii

    ooo mummy!! thanks a ton :P

    (m blushing!)

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  3. beautiful thoughtful.
    my fav line
    ideas in stagnant frame rots and you dance in the sweet scent..

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  4. hii Wise

    thanks a lot!

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  5. hii Sankoobaba

    thanks a lot !

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  6. nice :) What is reality?

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  7. hii Vishesh

    thanks a lot!
    reality is what actually happens as against what should happen

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  8. it was really good.. i second abhinav.

    the pictures at the proper places were also nice...

    ReplyDelete
  9. hii Amal

    thanks a ton buddy :)
    m so glad u liked it

    ReplyDelete
  10. So, true.
    Beautifully written :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. hii Shas

    thanks a ton!
    m so glad :D

    ReplyDelete
  12. Its unbelievably good!!! Bravo babe!!!!! Publish it!!!! :-)

    ReplyDelete
  13. hey Aditi!

    hiii! wassup? kahan ho yaar??

    thanks a ton dearrie!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Just too good!! Has so much of depth in it.

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  15. hii Ria

    welcome!

    thanks a ton.. :)
    kkep coming!

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  16. Excellent. Very thoughtful.

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  17. very nice poem...every word so very true!

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  18. hii Harman

    thanks a lot!

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  19. Thanks for visiting my blog and for your lovely comment.
    I appreciate for your wonderful poem. Keep it up!

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  20. Good food for thought and spicy curry for the soul. AS cooks some deliciously interesting dishes of prose and poetry in her kitchen of creativity. I am waiting for more such surprising additions to her menu.

    Soul and Spider, both weave their own webs in this physical world. How true. But, is it worth breaking the webs? After all, it is the web which makes the spider a true spider.

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  21. hii Babli

    thanks a ton!
    keep coming :)

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  22. hello Ashu Bhaiyya!
    first of all thanks a lot for this lovely comment :D

    I'll try my best to fulfill your expectations :)
    yes right.. out thoughts make us an educated person, prudent and wist but these must be open and flexible :)

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  23. Sorry I was still editing when you commented, so you missed the last part in the post :)

    Informed sources however claim, Rakhi is an eyewash, on Mr.Fevicol's advice, Anu Malik has been hired to remix Waca Waca and it will be sung and performed by Bappi Lahiri (in Na'vi costume and an extra kilo of gold).

    ReplyDelete
  24. hii Wise

    oh! read it now.. good post :)

    ReplyDelete
  25. lovely poem,
    what a juicy and fun spirits here. enjoyed your word flow!

    ReplyDelete
  26. hii Jingle

    welcome here!

    thanks a ton!
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  27. very nicely said.. the last verse especially was very good :)

    mine for the rally is ~here~

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  28. hii Leo
    welcome here!

    thanks a ton!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Wow, I feel like cheering after reading this. So great. Wonderful. I loved it.

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  30. ...In shame hung my head
    How exact was each word he said!
    I pondered and the spider was true
    I am a criminal, the victim being my soul
    As I broke the walls , like a bird it flew!
    ...

    ...Awesome ending to what is a wonderful piece of writing. :-)

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  31. First time here...

    Enjoyed the take...

    Hummming Bird at its best...

    Happy Rally...

    Sweet Dish

    --Someone Is Special--

    ReplyDelete
  32. hii Thoughtsnotlost

    welcome here!

    is it? thanks a ton! m so glad!
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  33. Dasuntoucha

    welcome here!

    thanks a ton!
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  34. hii Someone is special

    welcome here!

    thanks a ton!
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  35. EXCELLENT WORK!!! :D

    Beautiful... ur feel are portrayed so well here.

    i can picture the scene as i read every line :)

    your good =)

    ReplyDelete
  36. hi Harshika

    thanks a ton! m so glad u liked it!
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  37. What a great poem. I love the dialogue and the ending was beautiful.

    ReplyDelete
  38. nice little poem.. thanks so much for sharing!

    here's my rally post:
    http://lifeloveandmisery.wordpress.com/2010/09/12/collapse/

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  39. i really love this poem, great job!

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  40. This is a wonderful read!<3 :3

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  41. This read like a fable. So well done!

    ReplyDelete
  42. hii Frayedges

    thanks a lot!
    m so very glad
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  43. hii lifeloveandmisery

    thanks a ton!
    m so glad :D
    keep coming!

    ReplyDelete
  44. hii Lynn

    thanks a lot!
    keep coming :D

    ReplyDelete
  45. hii RiikaInfinityy

    thanks a lot! <3

    ReplyDelete
  46. hii TALON

    thanks a lot for this wonderful compliment!
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  47. You have painted a beautiful picture with your words...thanks so very much for linking with Potluck Poetry, it is wonderful to have you here. Much love xx

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  48. hii Buttercup!

    Thanks a ton for such a lovely comment :D

    keep coming!

    ReplyDelete
  49. what a sweet surprise...
    Glad that you make it all the way to Australia (Amanda) and New York City (Kavita)!

    Thanks for the yummy treat.
    please bring in more and feel free to taste others shares.
    Happy Happy Monday!

    ReplyDelete
  50. Very, very well written. I love the word play here. Love and Light, Sender

    ReplyDelete
  51. hii Senderupwords

    welcome here!

    thanks a ton!
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  52. I never met a Buddhist spider before, but perhaps that's because I didn't pay attention.

    An interesting dish you passed for this week's potluck!

    ReplyDelete
  53. hii Eric Alder

    welcome here!
    'Buddhist spider'.. hahaha..lol!
    that was cute indeed!

    thanks a lot and keep coming!

    ReplyDelete
  54. Wonderfully expressed truths. Nice blog, too. I love the kitty. Victoria

    ReplyDelete
  55. hiii Victoria

    welcome here!

    thanks a ton! yups I love this kitten too!
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  56. Excellent piece of Work.. The conversation and realization has so blatantly and yet so beautifully sketched...

    Great work... :D

    Love
    Olivia

    ReplyDelete
  57. hii Oliviasbiopiclog

    welcome to my blog!

    thanks a lot for such a wonderful comment :)

    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  58. This is wonderful! I love the conversation with the wise spider.

    ReplyDelete
  59. hii Teresa

    welcome here!

    thanks a ton!
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  60. hii fveloaf

    welcome to my blog!

    thanks a lot for such a wonderful comment :)

    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  61. http://jinglepoetry.blogspot.com/2010/09/monday-poetry-potluck-kings-queens-and.html

    Hello, friend:

    Monday Poetry Potluck Is NOW open, linking is open from Sunday 8pm to Tuesday, 8pm, welcome join us by linking in 1 to 3 poems, you could use an old poem, the more you share, the happier we are…hurry up!
    Thanks in advance.
    Hope to see you in our lovely potluck…

    ReplyDelete
  62. hii Olivia

    thanks buddy! yes sure :)

    ReplyDelete
  63. Well that was smart. You just told a short story in poetry form, but still sounding like a short story.

    ReplyDelete
  64. hii Marisol4you

    welcome here!

    thanks a ton!

    ReplyDelete
  65. You've spun a fine tale. I liked it as well, imagery from Lewis Carroll comes to mind.

    ReplyDelete
  66. hii AlmondJoycie

    welcome here!

    thanks a ton for this wonderful compliment!
    keep coming :)

    ReplyDelete
  67. hey there! love your beautiful work! So deeep....
    o when you have the time check out me blog!
    http://fearlessdreams.wordpress.com/2010/10/28/yes-im-a-girl/

    ReplyDelete
  68. hii fearless

    thanks for the lovely comment :)

    I loved ur blog too :)

    ReplyDelete
  69. excellent, really no words to express how beautifully it was written. awesome.

    ReplyDelete
  70. Hi GENIUS

    Thank you very much! I am really glad you like it!!

    :D

    ReplyDelete

Kindly copy your comments (using the right click) for it seems there is some issue with the blogger. Sometimes comments do not go through in the first attempt. :)