Bits & Pieces 7

What’s Your Dope?

A dashing cousin once confessed that his love for bikes and racing had surpassed his love for any other thing in the world. He got a peculiar kick by speeding his motorcycle on dimly lit Delhi roads late at nights with his biker gang. More than three fourths of his salary went into maintenance and accessories for this passion. I said that this was his dope. Another friend of mine enjoys watching movies and all of her time goes in browsing through IMDB and watching them like a sincere student, sometimes up to three in a row. This is her dope. We all have our own dopes. The word ‘dope’ that immediately reminds us someone high on drugs lying upturned in the middle of the road, actually is derived from the word ‘dopamine’ a chemical secreted by human brain that induces the feeling of happiness and bliss. My neighbor’s dope is gardening. Even when she is sick herself, I can spot her tending to her plants like they were infants, crying for her. To be happy, we just need to spot something that can give us innate happiness, an inextinguishable source of bliss. So, what’s your dope?

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Myopic on Biopic

The recent spurt in the graph of biopics in Indian cinema points towards a few things. Firstly, it is evident that fame and popularity scores over content and work. That is why notorious Charles Shobhraj can boast of a biopic made upon his wayward life and not Kailash Sathyarthi or such people who have put delinquent and painful lives back to track, who have gathered pieces together to make many a life worth living again. The recent biopic made in Hollywood upon the great Indian mathematician Ramanujan indicates how short sighted we have become when it comes to choosing subjects for this genre. Secondly, it is as if we have run out of new ideas, and people’s lives, no matter how banal they have been, are being turned into money grosser movies. I do not think some celebs whose lives have been captured on the wide screen deserve that much. No one has yet bothered to make a biopic on Hockey Wizard Dhyan Chand who impressed even Hitler first with his game and then with his loyalty towards his country. The next biopic, I read somewhere, is going to be on Late Kamala Das, the great Indian writer, and Vidya Balan is going to portray her feminist and enigmatic life. This is fine; she can motivate many women but still, there have been celebs who clearly did not deserve even a short docu-drama. We need to think and be more creative with story lines and plots and yes, music as well.

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Miss Attitude

I have noticed that for most people, esp girls, being rude and sarcastic means being modern. They have this deep rooted perception that not asking or replying politely, throwing weight around, snubbing acquaintances and loudly conversing in English with modern slangs thrown liberally is a clear recipe to become attractive, desirable and ‘hot’. It is a stupidity, a sheer one I dare say. No one can look lovely with an acerbic tongue and useless attitude that has roots nowhere in concrete. Attitude means having a spine and confidence to stand up for one self, the maturity to draw the line between friendliness and harassment, the courtesy and gravity to accept one’s mistakes. However, every other girl (even school going ones) is throwing dollops of attitude without even realizing how idiotic and insolent it makes her appear to others. 

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Bits & Pieces 6

Chitthi Aayi Hai!

One of the few things that can make me happily nostalgic is written letters. I still have preserved all the paper correspondence I used to have with a same age cousin when I was in school. In early 2000s, the fashion of writing letters started fading but with the advent of cell-phones and social media it has definitely become a long lost memory. We wrote each other letters out of sheer fun of writing and of course, for the excitement of receiving the next one.  Now, I am back on this track and with a few like-minded friends of mine, have joined the letter loving group!

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Biblio-mania

I cannot have enough of books and it seems I am slowly turning into a compulsive book hoarder, for I have a huge heap of unread titles in my room. Recently, on my trip to my ancestral house, I brought many of my late Grandpa’s books, most of them being classics printed around 1920s and 30s. Last week too, while browsing for something else, I impulsively bought two titles - one by Ruskin Bond and the other by Agatha Christie. Reading may be a good habit but book hoarding is definitely not, so now I will try my best to avoid buying books impulsively, at least this year.

 Rest in Peace...

My heart is deeply saddened by the demise of the brave horse Shaktimaan who died of shock after being given a dose of anesthesia. His case is an eye opener about the pathetic condition of animal-care in India. In western nations, even a local animal hospital is far better than any govt. hospital of India. In fact, after every hurricane and natural calamity, their special squads actively rescue pets and other animals. Such a thing is sadly unimaginable, rather laughable in our country where food grain remains scattered on roads due to lack of storage facility and thousands of liters of water is wasted in the construction of helipads for the ministers who go, ironically, to visit the drought hit areas. We have a mismanaged system working on wrong priorities. In such a scenario, animals remain the most tortured category.

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Bits & Pieces 5

The Name Game

I have quite often come across children with strange names that look as if taken out of some ancient or pagan language. This trend, I feel, is on a steady rise- more and more parents, esp in the younger generation are naming their kids with all sorts of unique names that seem Greek to most of the people. An acquaintance of mine named her daughter ‘Aneiya’ just because she thought it looked different. Even though she was clueless about the meaning of this word, she was happy as it sounded ‘you know very mod types’, she told me with a grin. I have come across strange sounding names like ‘Czarina’, ‘Imariya’, ‘Kieryna’, ‘Amieria’ and the like. The desire to stand out of the crowd and to look different has led us to focus only on the style factor and ignore the meaning of the name that a child will carry all his/her life. Someone named his son ‘Shankit’ that means ‘always in doubt’ (shanka- doubt) and another one ‘Gorky’ after the famous Russian writer Maxim Gorky (of ‘Mother’ fame). This word ‘Gorky’ literally means ‘bitter’ in Russian and it was a pen name the author had adopted to support the Labor Movement in Russia. To make the matters worse, some celebs have given strange name to their children that are often copied by the public. Such names like ‘Apple’, ‘Majesty’ and many more rather can make you feel lucky and thankful to your parents! My name is a Sanskrit word that means ‘inscribed’. Thank you mummy!

Image-babypicpoint.com

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Data Display!

The worst display can be, I think, the display of knowledge. Nothing can be more annoying than a self-boisterous gadfly hell bent on making you feel like an illiterate fool. Then there are certain people whose personal life is entirely detached from all the spiritual things they keep talking about. They are, in their very hearts, deeply envious, greedy and insecure and are often in a ‘defensive mode’ that is not letting the other person point out any flaw in whatever they state. Always ready to argue over things as petty as a spelling, a name or anything and always pouring out whatever they know at any available instant, they end up making complete fools of themselves and gathering contempt of others. Also, in most of the cases, their ‘knowledge’ that is always on display (often out of context), is merely a collection of facts and figures crammed from newspaper and magazines with little thought and novelty of perspective. Socrates rightly said ‘the biggest knowledge is to know that you know nothing’ How true!

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A Pattern Surfaces

There is a chain that links a few things together and creates a pattern that is rather worrisome and ugly. Trends like-

• Steep rise in road rage incidents and
• In animal cruelty
• In sales of violent video games
• In sale of cheap and erotic literature
• In soft-pornish dating shows on TV
• In high divorce rates and
• In porn search on internet

Taken in a totality, it points out that we are achieving freedom but at the cost of mental stress and loneliness. Animal tendencies are rising and people now openly fight for paltry properties and gold, openly abuse teachers and elders and display their desperate urges as if flaunting a medal. This entire scenario cries out that we need to go back to our roots, spirituality and nature to balance technology with socialization and brotherhood. I think everything that goes up and reaches its peak is often destroyed of its own excess.

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Bits & Pieces 4

Tu Mera Hero!  (You are My Hero)

Someone I know is all set to tie the knot with her intimidating and macho boyfriend very soon. This girl has been through all his temper tantrums and slaps, bouts of extreme possessiveness but still, like a dim-wit follower of a local pseudo god man, she is hell bent on marrying the boy who she  believes, is a hero and will make her life a secure heaven. Anyways, it is just one story amongst the millions where girls easily or rather willingly marry boys who are involved in brawls and even heinous crimes like rapes. The basic feeling that runs deep down is the point of ‘safety’ which, to most girls, means only physical strength and a dominating personality. 

Image- art.wallpaperhd.rocks

I feel such girls themselves lack confidence in their own selves or maybe they are too insecure and shudder at the very thought of a big bad world out there that gets them naturally and mindlessly attracted to men having such terrifying personalities. Surprisingly, they are often happy in facing physical abuse and severe excoriations all their lives and barter dignity for a sense of safety.

I discussed this with my friend and she gave me a solid suggestion for their wedding gift that made me laugh my ribs out! “Why don’t you gift her a year’s supply of Volini!”

Good one!

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Didi! (Elder Sister)

On One sleepy afternoon, a few days back, two cute little boys rang my doorbell. I answered from inside and one said ‘Aunty, ball aa gai hai, please de do’ (Aunty, please return our ball) but before I could utter a syllable, another one promptly interrupted in somewhat hushed tone and said ‘Pagal, Aunty bolega to nai milegi, didi bol’ (Dumbo, she won’t return if you’ll call her aunty, instead call her didi). And both cried in unison ‘Didi…didi please ball de do’ and honestly, I could not stop giggling for an hour or so! Such instances of pure innocence can make one smile even after years pass by.

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Blossoms!

I have of late grown quite fond of flowers and have even memorized the names of various types with much interest. I can name them like kids can tell you alphabet table- excitedly, in a single breath! Blossoms add a dash of color and style in other wise wilted and annoying days of scorching summers. I easily identified a wild flower growing in my neighbor’s garden. It was a white petunia (in pic) and for some reason seemed to me like an infant, too cute to avoid! There is another plant called ‘Chinese Lantern’ (in pic below) that has a box like net that covers the fruit and looks beautiful in fiery orange! Now, I have added to my ‘to-do’ list this task of buying new flower-plants from nearby nursery and placing them in beautiful pots (gamla) that are easily available in the markets now. I have plants in plastic pots but still I feel earthen ones are better. I prefer flowers in pots because of the ease in carrying and also you can arrange and place them as and where you wish, unlike rooted ones.

Images- castleofcostamesa.com and www.whiteflowerfarm.com

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Bits & Pieces 3

Great Expectations

The seven years old child of an acquaintance bears the brunt of his over-ambitious mother’s unending aspirations. He already attends three or four classes including swimming, music, self-defense and craft apart from school and tuitions. The lady proudly flaunts his abilities in front of every other guest esp. relatives and often forces him to sing-that-song or show-that-stroke, making a museum of sorts out of the weary child. Moreover, she chides him when he isn’t in the top three or four in academics. I think this is a bit too much. Also, the most important thing she has failed to notice (unlike all others) is that, her child never smiles and always keeps a poker-face. To me, he seems more like a tired, confused and sleep-deprived scientist, lost in his own thoughts and equations. To make the matters worse, she is not on very amiable terms with her ever-busy husband. Hence, the entire time and energy is unfortunately directed towards her only child, along with the load of her great expectations. 

(Image: www.illustrationsof.com)

Sanitary Shift

I have been noticing a trend of late. Remember those sanitary napkin ads where burly mothers would come and murmur to the audience how this or that brand saved them from embarrassment. Now, for last five years or so, preteen and teen girls have replaced those middle aged aunties. The protagonist is always a perky school or college going girl who uses the brand, mostly because she likes it and goes for that movie date wearing stark white trousers, smiling cheerfully with her boyfriend. Moreover, these ads have become very graphic too with capacity displayed by literally pouring the blue liquids into the product. Although this accentuates a research that girls are hitting the puberty fast but sometimes I think that some of these ads could have been a bit more subtle and classy. Too much showing of sanitary products (and their details) gives a yucky feeling, especially if you happen to watch them during meals and/or with elders.  

Blame Game

Someone told me about an incident that happened in her neighborhood. A young mother was indecently handled by the hot-bloodied son of an affluent builder, in the community park. The lady, coming from no less a background complained about this to the boy’s father who, instead, blamed her for inciting his son’s youthful feelings. He accused her of spending all her spare time in the park on the pretext of her toddler and attracting boys by giving them ‘wrong signals’. A verbal spat followed and for a few days, the lady stopped coming to that colony park but the father-son duo remained as shameless as ever. Now, this requires attention. No amount of wealth, class and education are enough to change certain deep rooted perceptions. In our society, if a girl is manhandled, she is looked down upon for titillating the ‘young hearts’ and calling for all the trouble. This attitudinal shift is the most important thing and such teachings come primarily from the family itself. Unfortunately, it seems this shift will take forever to arrive. 

(Image: www.shutterstock.com/video)

Bits & Pieces 2

LOL- Gappa!

I am a huge fan of gol-gappa but not when they are presented like some exotic French dish and are priced insanely. Yesterday only I had had an overpriced plate in a mall but the taste was nowhere near to our local vendor renowned for his perfection in making this heartthrob recipe! From pregnant ladies having their never ending craving for spicy things to old aunties as if revisiting their youth and from college students to chirpy kids, at any hour one can see people queuing up for chaat and all that stuff.

Some things can never taste good in a formal setting; for instance, I bet you cannot enjoy a D-I-Y gol-gappa kit in a flashy restaurant! A friend told me a few days back that she once paid Rs 85 per plate (5 pieces) for gol-gappa at Dilli-Haat! I was shocked! At Rs 17 per piece, it should be rather called ‘lol gappa’!

(Pic: mylovepakistan.wordpress.com/)

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Make Up Not Made Up

Today a friend casually remarked that girls who stay prim and proper are often perceived as vixens or high-maintenance-attitude-throwing types. She pointed out that a girl with tidied hair, manicured nails and a slight make-up reflects not only a person who has taken pains to wake up early to ready herself but also as someone who is not casual about her image. I could not agree more. I am reminded of an article I read sometime back about an Indian millionaire who was ridiculed by an American investor for being  obese and that if he could not manage himself how he could be trusted for managing  their investments properly; and that’s not an invalid point! The deeply humiliated millionaire came back into an enviable shape within months and since then has maintained a very healthy lifestyle, setting an example for everyone.

You do not have to look as made up as a bride straight out of a mandap but well fitted clean clothes with a little ironing, properly cut and managed hair, clean nails along with a little make up goes a long way in making good impressions and elevating one’s self confidence. It doesn’t take much time but those few extra minutes can make you confident and happy for sure!

(Pic: www.notonthehighstreet.com/alphabetbags/)

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Birthday Bloopers

A few weeks back, I forgot to wish a friend on her birthday and I cannot even describe what an emotional drama she created! She called me up and then after two-three taunts, all of a sudden hung up and then, sent me many longggg emotionally stirring messages hitting straight at my conscience. Accusing me of being an emotionless android and a detached self-centered apology of a human being, she has snapped all ties too.

Honestly, I was more concerned than annoyed. She needs to visit a psychiatric councilor and I believe if someone takes such petty matters to heart, the problem is indeed deep, what others bear are just some tremors.

(www.amazon.com/Angry-Forgot-Birthday-Joke)